FINAL GIRL explores the slasher flicks of the '70s and '80s...and all the other horror movies I feel like talking about, too. This is life on the EDGE, so beware yon spoilers!

May 6, 2014

MANIAC MADNESS: More Round One Action!


The results of yesterday's voting aren't surprising- I mean, the number one seeds beat the number sixteen seeds. No one was special enough to cause an upset, but everyone got some votes, so that's nice. But it's Jason Voorhees, Dracula, Pinhead, and Carrie White who are moving on to the next round. Here's your updated bracket; a printable, fill-in-able one can be found here.


Now then there's a lot of contests today, so get your voting finger ready! Or, you know, whatever appendage you use to vote. It's really none of my business.


Can Leslie Vernon's stupid-looking mask win out over Audition's Asami "I'm so terrifying and crazy I don't even need a mask" Yamazaki? In my heart, no way, not for a second, don't even think about it. Oops, no campaigning within 500 feet of the contest you're running!

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/slashers-psychos-asami-yamazaki-8-vs-leslie-vernon-9/question-4310245/" title="SLASHERS & PSYCHOS: ASAMI YAMAZAKI (8) vs LESLIE VERNON (9)">SLASHERS & PSYCHOS: ASAMI YAMAZAKI (8) vs LESLIE VERNON (9)</a>


Oooh, a tough one! Which handsome, normal-looking wacakadoo will you choose, Psycho's Norman Bates, or American Psycho's Patrick Bateman? Consider: only one of them has spawned a series! Also consider: only one of them is into Huey Lewis and the News!

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/slashers-psychos-norman-bates-5-vs-patrick-bateman-12/question-4310261/" title="SLASHERS & PSYCHOS: NORMAN BATES (5) vs PATRICK BATEMAN (12)">SLASHERS & PSYCHOS: NORMAN BATES (5) vs PATRICK BATEMAN (12)</a>


Look, I know that That Fat Cenobite from Hellraiser has a name, I'm just not interested in learning it. If he takes down The Creeper from Jeepers Creepers, I'll consider it...but don't get your hopes up!

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/animals-monsters-that-fat-cenobite-8-vs-the-creeper-9/question-4310265/" title="ANIMALS & MONSTERS: THAT FAT CENOBITE (8) vs THE CREEPER (9)">ANIMALS & MONSTERS: THAT FAT CENOBITE (8) vs THE CREEPER (9)</a>


Pumpkinhead is borne from sadness and revenge, The Funhouse's Monster is sad and bent on revenge. Neither of those situations warrant murder, but I am just saying.

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/animals-monsters-pumpkinhead-5-vs-the-monster-12/question-4310275/" title="ANIMALS & MONSTERS: PUMPKINHEAD (5) vs THE MONSTER (12)">ANIMALS & MONSTERS: PUMPKINHEAD (5) vs THE MONSTER (12)</a>


Samara from The Ring goes up against That Lady from Ju-on...I can't help you with this one, it's too tough for me to choose. And again, I'm sure she has a name but don't tell me what it is, I don't want to know!

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/ghosts-vampires-zombies-demons-samara-8-vs-that-lady-from-ju-on-9/question-4310283/" title="GHOSTS, VAMPIRES, ZOMBIES, DEMONS: SAMARA (8) vs THAT LADY FROM JU-ON (9)">GHOSTS, VAMPIRES, ZOMBIES, DEMONS: SAMARA (8) vs THAT LADY FROM JU-ON (9)</a>


Oh man. Everyone's favorite sentient zombie, Day of the Dead's Bub, versus Dark Night of the Scarecrow's Bubba, the kind special-needs fellow who's wrongly accused of murder and is subsequently gunned down in some cold-hearted revenge...and then he subsequently resurrected as a scarecrow and seeks his own revenge. I love both of them and both of these movies!

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/ghosts-vampires-zombies-demons-bub-5-vs-bubba-12/question-4310287/" title="GHOSTS, VAMPIRES, ZOMBIES, DEMONS: BUB (5) vs BUBBA (12)">GHOSTS, VAMPIRES, ZOMBIES, DEMONS: BUB (5) vs BUBBA (12)</a>


Here it is, the contests that gives our lives meaning. The house in The Amityville Horror had a portal to Hell in it, right? So then the house itself was, like, possessed? Which means that everything in the house, like the floor lamp from The Evil Escapes and the mirror from A New Generation (and the clock from It's About Time) is also possessed, yeah? And no matter where those things go, they wreak havoc because...umm...because nothing about Amityville makes any sense and it's just so great.

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/weirdos-weird-st-possessed-floor-lamp-8-vs-possessed-mirror-9/question-4310289/" title="WEIRDOS & WEIRD S**T: POSSESSED FLOOR LAMP (8) vs POSSESSED MIRROR (9)">WEIRDOS & WEIRD S**T: POSSESSED FLOOR LAMP (8) vs POSSESSED MIRROR (9)</a>


Wowee, lookit those ugly mugs! Hey, I don't feel bad saying that because they're all a bunch of murderous jerks. But which murderous jerks will win the day: The Cannibal Family from Wrong Turn, or The Mutant Family from The Hills Have Eyes?

<a href="http://www.sodahead.com/entertainment/weirdos-weird-st-the-cannibal-family-5-vs-the-mutant-family-12/question-4310291/" title="WEIRDOS & WEIRD S**T: THE CANNIBAL FAMILY (5) vs THE MUTANT FAMILY (12)">WEIRDOS & WEIRD S**T: THE CANNIBAL FAMILY (5) vs THE MUTANT FAMILY (12)</a>

Phew! That's a lot of work for you, I know. Thanks for playing along...now spread the word so we get more votes! Polls are open until midnight EST.

6 comments:

Porn Pup said...

Seems I'm voting for the underdogs! Asami's terrifying but I gotta vote for my man Leslie. Also, Samara didn't do it for me. Had it been Sadako then no contest.
The Creeper was only creepy when he didn't show his lizard bat face.

Dead In Hell said...

Leslie Vernon does have that stupid mask, but I'm sad to see him go so soon. Behind the Mask was great. I don't really get the love for Audition or the fascination with its female villain. I found it underwhelming all around. Maybe I should revisit it sometime.

Stacie Ponder said...

I don't know, I wasn't enamoured with Leslie Vernon at all, but I know that's not a widely-held opinion. It just didn't grab me.

Unknown said...

Fat Cenobite vs Creeper is a no brainer. Butterbal is never shown doing ANYTHING on film except blocking escape paths. The Creeper kills most of a town!

filmfancyNYC said...

Now - if it's Wes Craven's Mutant Family we're talkin about - that be a no-race.. wouldn't it? I mean - they went and killed Dee Wallace fer Chis'sakes - that's just plain evil..

Stacie Ponder said...

But he wears shades! HE'S SO COOL, RIGHT