FINAL GIRL explores the slasher flicks of the '70s and '80s...and all the other horror movies I feel like talking about, too. This is life on the EDGE, so beware yon spoilers!

Dec 26, 2011

like, drawings and whatever

When Final Girl readers commission sketch cards or art, it's nearly always horror-related. Weird how that works, isn't it? WELL. I just posted a big batch of recent stuff and here are said horror-related commissions! The rest of them can be seen here, and FYI, I'm available to make more so get in touch if'n you want some.

These first four cards are a set- the buyer asked for a 4-card set featuring "the history of slashers", but what that meant was up to my interpretation. He listed a few movies he likes, but otherwise it was my choice. Sooo...I went for a theme within some of the landmark slasher flicks. I really had too many ideas, though, and my brain is wrestling with a bigger project.

For these next three (Texas Chain Saw, My Bloody Valentine, Halloween), the buyers wanted specific scenes.

Dec 16, 2011

awesome movie poster friday - the WINTERTIME edition!

After 5 (I think) southern California winters, I am currently readjusting to a New England winter and I am a wimp! This isn't even a bad winter so far, but I find myself a shadow of my former self, wearing gloves and a scarf while the hearty folk around me are still clad in light jackets. As I acclimatize, I will simply have to drink as much fresh Dunkin' Donuts coffee as possible, I suppose.

But! It all brings to mind wintertime horror movies- not necessarily films centered around the holidays, but the ones full of so much snow and depressing, stark, bleakness of the season that you will put a Snuggie over your Forever Lazy even if you're watching them in July. It should be noted that I kind of love that depressing, stark, bleakness of the season and I'm happy to be in the midst of it again.

A few notes!
  • That Shining poster with the written note-according to LEGEND, Kubrick had designer Saul Bass work up 300 versions of the poster image, and I suppose this is one of them. I don't know why I put "legend" in all-caps, so don't ask.
  • Oh, Haunts. I watched it in bits and pieces and eventually made it all the way through. I'm unsure if I should give it another go, or if that would be a waste of time. It's one messed up little movie- and the ending! Okay, maybe I should watch it again. I'll probably regret it, but still.
  • Why did I only just find out that an alternate title for Devil Times Five (shown here under another alt title, The Horrible House on the Hill) is Peopletoys?? That is the best.
  • How many movies have used some variation on the tagline for Wind Chill ("There are some things worse than dying")? I'm sure Wind Chill isn't the first to use it, even. Also, I didn't think Wind Chill was that bad, really. SO SUE ME
  • That Dead Zone poster. What.
  • Have you seen The Children? I love it! It's at the top of my "watch it again" list.
  • Death House, btdubbs, is Silent Night, Deadly Night, which is one of those "I saw it a million years ago and I kind of hated it, but maybe I just wasn't in the mood or maybe even I just didn't get it at the time, so I should try again...or maybe it just stinks" kind of movies for me. You know how it is. Still, Mary Woronov!

Dec 15, 2011


Hi! Here I am, after 6++++ months of...I won't bother with the deets, but let's just say it's been 6++++ months of moving, living in a heck hole, moving, and moving again sprinkled with generous...err, sprinkles of horror movie apathy, writer's block, existential crises, pizza, and more. But none of that matters right now! What matters is that I am settled after months and months, I have internet in my home, and I actually feel like watching horror movies and getting the ol' FG back to what it was 4 years ago: fun for me to do. Horror used to be fun, and then for a multitude of reasons it wasn't, but I think it's getting back to that place. It is cause for rejoicement, so I made this!

Final Girl is back. Hooray!

So yes. I kind of hate "I'm back" posts, but, you know. I'm back.

Have you seen this Trail-Or for Argento's Dracula 3D yet? Watch now watch now watch now!

WHAT IS THAT. WHAT IS IT? This guy made Suspiria? How? But you know, I don't care. I want to see this big pile of hot 3D mess so bad! Hissing, topless vampires! Vampires going "rarrr!"! A giant praying mantis! Asia Argento! A vampire death scene rivaled only by that of Paul Reubens in Buffy the Vampire Slayer! Again: A GIANT PRAYING MANTIS!

Dracula 3D comes along right when I'm feeling all ready to jump back into horror's lovin' arms and nuzzle her matronly bosoms. Oh Argento, we couldn't have timed this better if we tried!

Nov 4, 2011

awesome movie poster friday - the ARGENTO edition PART 2!

That's right, this is the Argento Edition Part Two. Part One is hanging out here. Why more Argento? WELL. I find myself oddly intrigued by his forthcoming Dracula 3D. It just seems like it'll be a big clusterfuck, doesn't it? But I mean that in a decidedly boss way- it'll be a decadent clusterfuck in three whole dimensions! Like a cake made by an eight-year-old. Instead of simply having a cake and some frosting, it will have sprinkles, various syrups, gummy eyeballs, Hershey's kisses, and a Star Wars figure (Luke Skywalker in X-Wing pilot gear) on top. In other words, it'll be gross and horrible, but you can't look away and you can't help but admire the lack of restraint.

Now I can't wait for it!

Oct 31, 2011

SHOCKtober Day 31

Here we are. The end of the month already! I'm fixin' to put on my costume (plague doctor...or, at least, a janky-ass plague doctor) and head out the door...but first, the all-important last couple of favorite characters! These are the only characters who got more than one y'all must really love 'em. I don't blame you.

Ash Williams (The Evil Dead)

I don't think anyone could have predicted that the last man standing in The Evil Dead would go on to become a favorite character. People loves some Ash! I wonder how many heads will explode when a casting decision is made should the Diablo Cody-penned E.D. remake come to pass.

Gill-Man (Creature from the Black Lagoon)

What is it about ol' Gilly? I can't quite say, but I know he's always been my favorite movie monster. There's something so cool about him...and believe me, I know cool! One time I saw Rick Springfield in concert.