FINAL GIRL explores the slasher flicks of the '70s and '80s...and all the other horror movies I feel like talking about, too. This is life on the EDGE, so beware yon spoilers!

Feb 27, 2007


I bet you looked at that picture and thought to yourself..."Wow, a myopic, asthmatic Ken Foree of George Romero's Dawn of the Dead? I bet this picture is from a movie that has something to do with demonic strippers!"

For once, you'd be right- but I should remind you that not everything has to do with demonic strippers. If the cashier at Stop & Shop forgets to ring up your coupon for Chock Full O' Nuts, that doesn't mean she's a demonic stripper. Just because your neighbor's dog looks at you funny, that doesn't mean your neighbor's dog is a demonic stripper....ok? I know I've chided you in the past about your "demonic stripper this" and "demonic stripper that", and I don't want you to take this instance as complete validation. I mean, even a broken clock is right twice a day. I'm only looking out for your best interests, I swear.

And NO, that doesn't make me a demonic stripper! Geez, you're just not getting it, are you?

Anyway, if you want to know what a myopic, asthmatic-looking Ken Foree has to do with demonic strippers, then you'll have to totally click this link right here and read my review of Devil's Den over yonder at Pretty/Scary.


Jesse Hammer said...

Sounds like a bad remake of "Vamp", which I love.

Will somebody please give Ken Foree a real job? Please? C'mon, he's good. Really.

Anonymous said...

...okay, I get it. My neighbor's dog is a demonic stripper, but only twice a

Anonymous said...

Well, sure, that doesn't make you a demonic stripper, Stacie. But I'm pretty sure the horns, tail, glowing eyes, ravenous appetite for men's souls, and G-string do.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. Who am I to judge? "The power of Christ com—ooh, do that hip-shaky thing again."

Anonymous said...

In the third picture, it sure looks like Kelly Hu is a vampire, which makes the "government assassin" angle cooler. Or sillier, depending on how you look at it.

S said...

Hey. I just found this blog and I have to say it is FANTASTIC. Been spending the last two days reading old posts, and laughing my ass off!

Stacie Ponder said...

Devil's Den COULD have been a really fun movie...but alas, it simply didn't push the envelope enough for me. It sort of sputtered out after 15-20 minutes, and that was that. Bleh.

Jesse- I have this fantasy when I like...I don't know, win 10 billion dollars in the lottery or something, and I can finance movies starring people like Ken Foree who aren't "mainstream" material any longer. The movies will rock. And because I'm so rich, when the movies come out on DVD the DVDs will be made of SOLID GOLD.

Bill- just replace the word "souls" with "money" and you're pretty much spot-on! :P

Welcome, S! Thanks very much...I aim to please.