I'd heard good things about the 2002 Hong Kong horror flick The Eye, and finally decided to check it out. Something in my brain has short-circuited, however, and while I did, in fact, watch the film and enjoy it, I can't think of a damn thing to say about it.
I mean...nothing. You should turn back now before I embarrass myself any further.
No, really- go. Come back tomorrow and I'll have something to say, I swear. But today...today is a wash.
"Well, Stacie, why the hell are you writing then? Why don't you just wait until you figure out something worthwhile to say, rather than simply blathering on about nothing? Why waste my time putting all these useless words up here? What gives? You're a jerk, Stacie...a jerk."
OK, maybe you're right. I probably shouldn't be typing away if I have nothing to say, and I most definitely should not hit "publish post" when I'm done. But you know what? I'm gonna. That's right, I'm gonna! And while you're reading this and thinking "My god I'm bored!", you'll see that my next sentence is about how I knew you were going to be bored and aren't you bored right now? And let me tell you, that'll be some postmodern shit right there. Some boring ass postmodern shit.
I told you my mental capacities would deteriorate by the end of the month, didn't I? We all knew going into this endeavor that eventually it would come down to a post just like this one, right? Where I'm no longer able to formulate cohesive thoughts on film, where I just go on and on and no one cares! This is no review. This is a train wreck. Let us all hope that I come out the other side of this manic episode with a little shred of my brain remaining and perhaps, a teeny little shred of my dignity. It's doubtful, but if we all link our metaphorical pinks together and think positively, it might just happen.
You know, it's a very minor tragedy that the B-52s are most famous for "Love Shack". It sucks, and "Legal Tender" is a much better pop song.
No, I'm not drunk. I am, however, feeling used up like a late-70s Times Square hooker.
The Eye. Not bad. Some creepy moments, but I saw it and that was that. I give it 7.5 out of 10 trips to the time-out chair.
Oh, and +10 points and a designation: cool to anyone who gets the post title reference.