awesome movie poster friday - the FRIDAY THE 13th edition, PART TWO!

Happy Friday the 13th, everyone! Hooray. As I'd already done a Friday-flavored Awesome Movie Poster Friday, I wasn't hopeful that there'd be much more material out there for me to mine. Ha HA, I laugh in my own face. There's plenty of Voorhees weirdness all the world 'round! And I do mean weird...some of this stuff...I just don't get it.

While I truly despised the recent remake, I will say the posters associated with it are truly outrageous awesome.

23:45 - The Exorcist

(review)

today in NOT HORROR.

This is why kids who grew up in the 70s still think the 70s are the best.



That's the Pointer Sisters, in case you didn't know. Oh, and Happy Birthday, Sesame Street.

so i made a movie: LIP STICK, part one

No, Shannon Lark and I aren't done making stuff yet. Yes, I'm still working on Ludlow. Being a one-woman band can be taxing, but it's neat to wear cymbals between one's knees.

Sorry, I need more coffee.
------------------------------

SHANNON LARK: With all the ballyhoo over Ludlow, Voyeur, and the 100 million other things that Stacie Ponder and I collectively have going on (ahh, the life of an artist), I suddenly realized while eating chocolate chip ice cream last night that we haven't even begun the wonderful journey of reporting on our first co-directorial feat: Lip Stick....

This wonderful little film came about when Stacie was developing the script for Ludlow. Never having worked together before, we felt (at least I did) that throwing out ideas into the open will help the creative errr...juices get flowing.

STACIE PONDER: That's right- that's how SHE felt. Here she was, this girl I barely knew- some actor for crying out loud- flapping her gums and throwing around all these "ideas".

Okay, fine...so I invited her ideas and I threw mine her way before I'd written anything. It was a strange way for me to put together a script, this "collaboration", but I loved having someone to really bounce ideas off of, even if mine often made no sense. And look! We got a whole 'nother script out of it.

SHANNON LARK: I had this idea that maybe the main character should be a chronic masturbator. I emailed Stacie in a flurry, all flushed in the face with excitement. From there I launched into an entire story about a woman who can't stop masturbating, with a serious case of vagina dentata on the brain.

I know, I know. This sounds like a porn. Actually, it sounds like a great porn, but the script actually is really, really fucked up- ie: my kinda horror movie.

Stacie humored me for a while, but I soon realized that this is a story I should take and run with, and might not be suitable for Ludlow.

STACIE PONDER: I am not one to question the whimsies of Shannon Lark (if chronic masturbation can truly be called a "whimsy")- it just...yeah, it wasn't the right...err, track to explore with the way Ludlow was coming together. If your main character is a CHRONIC masturbator, then that really needs to be addressed in the script, in my opinion. It's not quite like making your character chew gum all the time, which may only prompt a "Oh, I guess she really enjoys gum!" from the audience; if the lead is masturbating almost all the time, you should probably mention why she's constantly gettin' her diddle on,you know?

That said, I could see that Shannon was enthusiastic about this character tic, so I suggested she take it and run with it (boy, did she)...but that if she really wanted her character to masturbate in Ludlow, I'd work it in somehow.

Yes, this is the way we operate.

SHANNON LARK: So I wrote it up as a script, investigating how the story of vagina dentata is just about as old as jesus. It's been told throughout every culture, in some form or another, to keep boys away from strange women who might trap them with their feminine devices. It's classic. It's timeless. It's VAGINA DENTATA!!

STACIE PONDER: It's fun for the whole family!

Sorry, that's...really wrong.

SHANNON LARK: After a failed shoot in Oklahoma City due to finances, in early July I still had no idea how the hell I was going to get this film shot. I considered using the film crew around where I live, but then I realized how much masturbating I was going to be doing, and I decided against it. The neighborhood kid down the street doesn't need to be on a set like that, you know?

STACIE PONDER: Or does he?

SHANNON LARK: Ludlow came and went, and Stacie and I were forever changed and bound in sinners blood (and tuna juice).

STACIE PONDER: Okay, stop. Just to clear the air, she really means tuna juice. Like, juice from a tuna. A tuna fish. Juice. She spilled tuna juice all over one of the beds in our little room at the Ludlow Motel, and it stank up the place. Then later I spilled peperoncini juice all over the crotch of my pants, and that stank up the place even more. Sometimes having a cast of, at most, three and a crew of one is a good thing.

SHANNON LARK: We shot Voyeur in San Francisco, and throughout all the ridiculous amount of technical difficulties and rampantly loose car brakes, we came out OKAY. It dawned on me right before I went on a trip to LA that Stacie and I could do this movie together. We practically made a feature in 2 days, so what could possibly stop us from making Lip Stick with absolutely no money? I milled it over with Stacie and we agreed to co-direct the film.

STACIE PONDER: It's never stopped me before, that's for sure. I've never had a budget over a whopping low-4 figures, and before Ludlow, I kept things within the $50 range. SHOCKING, I know.

I've never "co-directed" anything before, but Shannon and I had already established a very collaborative working style, so I figured it would be more of the same- I'd just end up with a fancy credit. But of course I was flattered she wanted to make this movie with me, so I was all, "Yes, please."

SHANNON LARK: Then I did an interview with the Last Blog on the Left, where I acted like a complete nutcase. I was so excited that I was shaking and sweating by the end of the interview. I reached for more coffee and hauled ass on getting the props together. I wanted to bring as much as I could to the table.

After being on the road for about 3 weeks I flew to Burbank and Stacie picked me up at the airport. We were so excited for what was in store: shooting the remainder of Ludlow, Lip Stick, and then off to Death Valley to roast our hair off. I won't go into detail about Ludlow, or Death Valley, because I'm sure we will cover in that in the "So I Made a Movie: Ludlow" series, but know this: IT WAS AWESOME.

STACIE PONDER: Yeah, hmm. I should update people on the happenings Ludlow at some point, I suppose. Until then, yes, I wholeheartedly agree: we ended up having an incredible week of making movies and roasting in the sun and freezing under the moon. I LOVE DEATH VALLEY.

SHANNON LARK: Stacie had recommended we shoot at the Amargosa Opera House, which has a motel connected to it, right outside of Death Valley. Marta Becket owns the Opera House and paints all over the walls: the headboards, bathrooms, ceiling borders, everything! I researched the website and decided on the perfect room. When we arrived to the motel it was f-ing hot, but nothing like what we were going to experience in Death Valley. Stacie had mentioned it was out in the middle of nowhere, but I didn't think there would actually be NOTHING out there. Luckily, the motel had a restaurant attached with a really, really nice waitress who gave us grapes they grew out there. How the hell they were able to grow grapes out there is beyond me. It must have been in a special greenhouse...or something.

STACIE PONDER: Some time ago a friend tipped me off about the Amargosa, how it was this amazing, kind of magical place out by Death Valley, and I'd originally intended to go there to shoot Ludlow. Once that script was finished, though, it was patently obvious that it wouldn't suit my needs- it's a weird place, but not creepy enough...certainly not fleabag-y enough. Though it's in the middle of nowhere (like Shannon said, there's NOTHING around), the building itself doesn't feel isolated, if that makes sense. On top of all that, it's a good 4+ hours away from Los Angeles, and I certainly couldn't ask the other actors to drive out there to shoot for a couple of hours. The Amargosa never left my mind, though, so when Shannon and I started talking about Lip Stick, I threw it out there. I'm just glad she found it as intriguing as I did.

SHANNON LARK: After eating and unpacking the car into the incredibly small room we were shooting in, we immediately set up and got down to business. Our neighbors were definitely in for a treat.:)

23:45 - Dawn of the Dead (1978)

double your terror

Yo! MTV Raps So check it, y'all...this week at AMC I'm all about doubling your pleasure, your fun, and your frights with a wee column about twins in horror movies. Yes, I talk about The Shining, but I posit that the Grady Girls are the most famous horror movie twins who are not, in fact, twins. I am a rabble-rouser, caring not a whit for my own well-being in the face of the slings, arrows, and "UR so dum of course they R twinz LOL a-hole" from The Internet. Read my piece and say what you will!

In other news, my fucking ONE THOUSANDTH post is coming up super fast. What should I do to celebrate? Should I simply wear something fancy while I post a picture of someone from some obscure 80s sitcom, something that has nothing to do with horror? Nah, I do that all the time...hmm. I don't know. I'd like to do something interactive-y, but I don't even know what that means and it sounds way too cyber for my meager blogging skills.

23:45 - The Omen (1976)

Happy Birthday, Brittany Murphy!

Y'all, I have an unabiding, irrational, and unconditional love for Brittany Murphy...the kind of love you have for an actor that makes you sit through movies you wouldn't normally watch with 10-foot eyeballs (yes, I've seen Uptown Girls), the kind that causes you to deny all the rumors outright (even when you hear them from a really good source), the kind that makes you sad when the actor's career ends up...not where it should be.

She gets such a bad rap in the court of public opinion for...well, I don't know why, really. There are other celebrities out there raping, murdering, drunk driving, having affairs- yet Murphy is almost universally maligned for making some bad movies and assumptions about her private life. Really, though, that's all neither nor there, and as I said I deny all rumors anyway. The point is, I think she's a rather extraordinary actress who's vastly underappreciated. Once the elder generation of lauded actresses retires- the Dench-caliber ladies- who the fuck from the younger generation is going to take up the crown? It's a short list, in my opinion, and I hope Murphy can pull her career out of the basement to join it.

Yeah, she underwent some sort of transformation that seems, to be, "Hollywood" mandated and yeah, she'd made some caca mainstream movies that flopped. But then there's Clueless (fucking classic), and there's Girl, Interrupted- the film for which Angelina Jolie got all the glory. Jolie's performance is pretty damn good but it feels a bit showy to me, all surface- contrast it with Murphy's turn (or Angela Bettis's, for that matter), where there's a few more layers added to your standard "crazy" character. Watch Spun, watch some King of the Hill, watch Sin City and Common Ground and Freeway and for fuck's sake watch The Dead Girl, a fantastic movie which she (along with Toni Collette, Kerry Washington, Mary Beth Hurt, and Marcia Gay Harden) tears up, and see what you think. She's got range, and she's one of those few actors who has the ability to make you forget their real name while they're on screen...at least for me, but again, this is maybe an irrational thing.

She's dabbled in horror a bit, most notably in the darkly comedic slasher flick Cherry Falls, which I really need to get around to reviewing. There, now I've tied this odd diatribe about one of my favorite actresses into my usual content here at Final Girl. Hooray!

23:45 - The Thing

23:45 - My Bloody Valentine (1981)

(review)

new feature, hooray!

Today I'm starting this ongoing feature wherein I post a screencap from 23:45 in random horror films. Who knows what kind of magic we'll find along the way?

There was some film blog out there that used to do something similar, but after A LOT of searching last night, I couldn't find it. If anyone knows what it is, let me know so I can link back with a "I'm aping this" annotation.

EDITED TO ADD: It's been pointed out to me that what I'm thinking of is the 20:07 series at the most excellent blog The Film Experience. 'Tis true...so there you go, I'm aping that.

Also, 23:45 is just a nice number- no significance otherwise. Let's see what happens.

Also also, I'll be posting them without text (save a link to my review, if I've written one)...I'll let the pictures speak for themselves and run my stupid mouth in the comments section, hooray!

A Field Guide to Horror Movie Jerks

I've talked alot about jerks here at Final Girl. Usually I'm referring to people who disagree with my opinions or don't like the things I like or something- you know, Paul Reiser fans and the such. After all, this is The Internet, and therefore anyone who doesn't think exactly as I do is a jerk.

Today, however, I want to focus on horror movie jerks. I've talked about those in the past as well, but never have I written...

A Field Guide to Horror Movie Jerks!

Yes, my friends, there are many varieties. I'd like to get a few guidelines out of the way first: first and foremost, I'm talking about the jerks who are essentially a part of the protagonist's posse. It goes without saying that the bad guys are jerks- I mean, they kill people; and sometimes the villains have lackeys who definitely cross from expected bad guy jerkiness into wicked bad guy jerkiness- Mr. Straker, I'm looking at you. In the interests of this guide, however, the discussion is relegated to secondary characters who are purportedly on the side of "good". There, glad that's settled.

#1: The Jerk You Can't Help But Like

I love Annie from John Carpenter's Halloween. Perhaps it was a steady diet of "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions" when I was young, I don't know...but whatever the reason, I generally love a smart and/or sassy mouth, especially when the person wielding said mouth is cranky (see also: Barbeau, Adrienne - Ed.). Mayhaps it's all rebellion against my 5th grade Social Studies teacher, Mrs. Nickerson, who told me that "Nobody likes sarcasm!" as I was getting in trouble for...well, for having a smart mouth borne of a steady diet of "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions". I beg to differ, Mrs. Nickerson! I love sarcasm and I love Annie Brackett, even though she's kind of a jerk to her friends and the children she babysits...although I Lindsay kind of deserved it. Wait, what was I talking about again? Ah yes, the jerk you're smiling at despite the jerkiness, and you're kind of bummed when they die.

#2: The Jerk Who Turns Out Not To Be A Jerk

Friends, this variety of jerk is perhaps the most rare. Moments within their walking onscreen, you can generally tell into which category a horror movie character will fall: The Joker, The Slut, The Final Girl, etc (this is doubly true for slasher flicks). Unless there's a total a-hole making an appearance, The Joker is usually The Jerk. You'd think this was the case with Ted in Friday the 13th, Part 2...but then somehow, the goofy guy ends up not as goofy as you thought he'd be, you realize he's not a jerk at all, and guess what? He lives until the end of the movie. Coincidence? You decide! (the answer is no. - Ed.)

#3: The Jerk Who May Have A Point

Oh lawd, how I loathe that Harry Cooper! He and Ben bicker throughout Night of the Living Dead- each trying to be Alpha Dog, each has wildly diverging ideas on how the group of survivors should deal with the oncoming zombies. Thing is, Ben is all cool and level-headed while Harry is all sweaty and yell-y and mean to his wife....in other words, he's a jerk. However, his plan- that they barricade themselves in the basement and wait for help- wasn't so bad. In fact, the group's numbers whittle down until it's just Ben left alive, at which time he implements Harry's plan and survives the night (and then the posse of jerks kills him anyway, so who are the monsters? - Ed.). Maybe if Mr. Cooper had been a bit nicer about expressing his ideas, none of them would have become zombie chow. That wouldn't have solved The Problem With Karen, but still.

#4: The Jerks Who Are Extremely Irritating

Like the white trash gross family in Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning, this variety of jerk is incessantly annoying. They're loud, or they look like they smell, or they're stupid (or they're some combination of all three), and from the moment they appear you simply cannot wait for them to die so they will just shut the eff up and you will no longer have to look at them. (I like how the teeth of the F13-5 family are only rotten at the gumline. - Ed.)

#5: The Jerk You Feel Bad For Disliking

I think it would probably be misery to hang around with Shelly from Friday the 13th Part 3. Come on- those "practical jokes" would be old before they even start. He's dull and kind of whiny and he's awkward, but I feel bad labeling him a jerk (even though truly, he is one) because he doesn't fit in and he just wants some friends and who's never felt that way at some point in his or her life? (not me, certainly...how dare you insinuate, madame! - Ed.) However, as I start to feel sorry for Shelly, he goes and calls Vera a bitch because she doesn't want to sleep with him, but she was really nice about it and didn't deserve it. Jerk!

#6: The Jerk Who Is A Power-Mad Bully

Oh my, yes. These are the jerks with the guns, or the key to the truck, or something else that gives them the tiniest edge in the fight against whatever horror movie villain everyone's facing. (see also: the security guard in the Dawn of the Dead remake - Ed.) He uses his advantage as a last grasp at power in the face of the coming chaos, torturing and threatening everyone else along the way...sometimes even calling them names! Obsessed with maintaining control, this jerk will often put himself and everyone else in jeopardy with foolhardy actions just because they all said he shouldn't and HE'S THE BOSS. Captain Rhodes of Day of the Dead is such a power-mad jerk that he even tries bossing the zombies around, commanding them to choke on his legs as they eat him.

#7: The Cowardly Jerk Who Dicks Everyone Over

This douchebag jerk will do anything for a promotion or money. When push comes to shove, they'll push and/or shove you out of the way to get to the lifeboat. Resorting to inhumane behavior to save their own skin, they use allies as human shields (see also: Dr. Crews in Friday the 13th Part VII - Ed.), shut doors in people's faces, refuse to open doors no matter how much the person on the other side screams...they'll do anything to survive. They're the slimy snakes of the world of the horror movie jerk, and I CAN'T BELIEVE I PUT A PICTURE OF PAUL REISER ON FINAL GIRL but Burke is a shining example of Jerk #7, so there you go. (I can't believe you put a picture of Paul Reiser on Final Girl. - Ed.) I hate him with the white-hot intensity of a thousand sunburns like the one I got when I went to volleyball camp in 10th grade. (You went to volleyball camp? - Ed.)

#8: Franklin

Franklin, Franklin, Franklin. The king of all horror movie jerks- he certainly qualifies as several varieties, no? He's extremely irritating, yet for a few moments here and there you feel bad for hating him: the dude is in a wheelchair, clearly envious of the bipedariffic frolicking of his sister and her friends. ("bipedariffic" is a scientific term. - Ed.) He has a miserable life, but then he chooses to make the lives of everyone else around him- including the audience- miserable as well. Plus, he's sweaty and he clearly smells like sausage.

There you go, a little primer on Horror Movie Jerks. What did we learn today, friendos?

• If you have need of a good horror movie jerk, watch any George Romero or Friday the 13th movie. Jerks abound!
• Jerks always get what's coming to them. So much time is spent making the viewer side against this person that they're practically filled with bloodlust by the time the jerk gets killed. Seriously, when people are rooting for the mass murderer instead of you, you may want to rethink how you interact with your fellow human beings.
• Don't be a jerk!
  

Happy Birthday, Courtney Thorne-Smith!

I have an odd amount of affection for the 1987 comedy Summer School. I do not know why, but there it is, I've said it. I am immune to your judgments!

That's the earliest I recall seeing Courtney Thorne-Smith in anything...of course, a few years later she would go on to play Allison Parker, the exceedingly irritating small-town girl navigating life in the big city on a little something I like to call Melrose Place.

Okay, so that's actually the name of the show, not some little nickname I made up- but that's beside the point! The point is, I suppose I was meant to love and/or identify with Allison and her on-again off-again roommate/paramour Billy Campbell, but the truth is I couldn't stand either one of them. There it is, I've said it. I am immune to your judgments!

Now, if all of that wasn't enough reason to celebrate Courtney Thorne-Smith a-bustin' out of her mama some time ago, then let me remind you about her greatest performance of all: as Cheryl Ann Davis, Dairy Princess in Midwest Obsession, aka Beauty's Revenge.

One of these days I'll have a copy of Midwest Obsession to make out with at night...but during the day, I will review it here. I don't care if it's a Lifetime movie. I've reviewed them before, and I think I may start doing so again- slying incorporating them into the content here at Final Girl, for they bring me so much pleasure. Don't worry, I'll just tackle the murderiffic ones- nothing about lonely widows finding love with the handsome handyman, nothing about laughing your way through breast cancer, nothing about orphans finding families at Christmastime- well, unless the orphan's name is Esther.

Anyway, yes, Lifetime movies. I mean, I don't want to start a whole 'nother blog, you know? It's time to branch out a bit. There it is, I've said it. I am immune to your judgments!

In summation, happy birthday Courtney Thorne-Smith! May all your movies be flogging movies.

awesome movie poster friday - the SILENT HILL edition!

Man, I loves me some Silent Hill. Of course I'm totally cuckoo nutso for the games, but I thought the movie was pretty damn good, too. The acting isn't always great and the dialogue is frequently...not good, but the visuals are pretty kick ass. I do hope the sequel, which is currently flopping around in development hell, sees the light of day. If it were me, I'd base that shit on the second game in the series, which has a lot of cinematic potential. In fact, I'm willing to volunteer for the job of writing it! I've volunteered before, and quite frankly I'm shocked that no one has asked me to get cracking yet. It seems so odd to me that "Hollywood" doesn't read my blog and hasn't yet decided to hand a multi-million dollar property over to someone who's passionate yet completely unproven. Come on, people...it would be the heartwarming story of the year!

be your own Romero

Hey, remember that time when my AMC column featured some tips for making your own low-budget horror movie? Yeah? Well, guess what- this week I'm giving out more totally unsolicited filmmaking advice! Hooray!

Speaking of unsolicited advice...I can't say I'm wild about what you've done with your hair.

Also, it's hard to believe that I'm not earning a living with my clearly AMAZING Photoshop skills.

i've made my choice!

Wow kids, sorry it's taken so long for me to pick the next...pick for Film Club. What matters now is that I've gone and done it. Behold, for I'll say it now:

The Wicker Man (1973)!

Please note, I'm talking about the original version, the Christopher Lee and his crazy hair edition- NOT the Nicolas Cage in a bear suit remake. Was Nicolas Cage in a bear suit in the remake? I think he was...or he kicked a bear-suited person in the face or something like that. I don't know, I haven't seen it. Maybe I will...maybe I won't. But no matter the direction my whims take me in the future, this installment is all about the '70s, baby. Netflixers, click here!

The film: The Wicker Man (1973)
The due date: Monday, December 14

As always, email your review to me at: stacieponder at gmail dot com. Be sure to include a link to Final Girl in your post!

a look back at the other day

Well, my friends...SHOCKTOBER is officially SHOCKOVER.

I know. I feel your pain. My jack-o-lanterns are already caving in on themselves as if they've each got a bad case of meth face...my local Target took down their display of horror movies...and -GASP- I watched 2 movies yesterday with no intent at all of reviewing them! It all feels so strange- although one of those movies I'm going to have to write about because...well, I just have to. But this post is not about looking ahead to the future, oh now- it's about remaining stuck in the past! I'm going to extend that Halloween feeling by doing a little post-game wrap-up of the month that was, using the same categories I did for my very first October wrap-up waaaay back in 2 thousand fucking FIVE! However, in the interests of being fresh and exciting, I'll use some new categories as well. Oh, SHOCKTOBER, I just can't let you go.

Movie that kicked my ass the hardest: Hmm. I don't know, did any movie actually kick my ass this month? I liked- even loved- quite a few flicks this month, but nothing really threw me for a loop like The Brood did that first year. Splinter was pretty effing righteous, but the movie I keep coming back to, the one I keep thinking about, is Voice. Yeah, that surprises me, too.

Person I saw the most onscreen during the month: Terry O'Quinn made two appearances: The Stepfather and Pin. Dina Meyer was also in two movies this month: Crazy Eights and Saw. Good thing I like them...you don't want to know what would happen if I despised them! Okay, nothing would happen...so sue me.

Person I saw the most OF onscreen during this month: Oh, boobs. Where would we be without you? Wrong Turn 3, Trick 'r Treat, Slaughter High...and plenty of other movie featured this month featured women in all their glory. Then again, Slaughter High featured Marty in all his glory, too...equal opportunity and all that. Whether "glory" should actually apply to any of it is up to you.

Best moments: Really, any moment from Mausoleum applies here as the entire affair constitutes one 90-minute long best moment.

Reaffirmed infinite love: Slaughter High is the only film I watched this month that I'd seen before and yes, my infinite love was, in fact, reaffirmed. "Let's par-deeeeeeee!" Ugh...SO GOOD.

Most disturbing visual: Disturbing...well, the shitty latex mask in Wrong Turn 3 certainly disturbed me, and hairy people copulating in Nail Gun Massacre was something I never wanted to see. As far as, you know, disturbing in a deliberate, horror movie way...I don't know. Nothing's really jumping out at me. That gives me the sads, seriously.

Best comment: First of all, thanks to everyone who took a moment to chime in with a comment throughout the month (or anytime, for that matter). But! The prize goes to both Nick for "'..and of course you know my good friends Dr. and Mrs. Nietsneknarf...'"on Dracula A.D. 1972, and Joel Henry Minkin for "I wish I could cause spontaneous embroidery via combustion" on The Spell. Incidentally, the films that brought about the most conversation (as of this writing) are Saw and Wrong Turn 3, with 18 comments a piece, while no one gives two shits about Hardware or Crazy Eights- they finished with a whopping zero comments each! Harrumph.

Most infuriating: Obviously The Toybox can go fuck itself as I couldn't even make it through a viewing of that thing, and Stan Helsing bit it hard, too...but Wrong Turn 3 was absolutely the most infuriating. It hurt my heart place to watch such a shitariffic sequel to a movie I love so much.
Theme of the month: Houses, buildings, more houses, and more buildings. From The House with Laughing Windows to Mausoleum to Catacombs to Black House to The Morgue to House of Seven Corpses to Slaughter High to Haunting of Winchester House, I certainly had my fill of plaaaaaaces of terrrrrror.

So there you go. I'm sad to see SHOCKTOBER come to an end, but it's also a relief not to review a movie every day. It takes it out of ya! Oh, yeah, I did cheat that one day where I talked about video games. But it's my site, I can do whatever I want! See? I can post a picture that doesn't have anything to do with anything if I want to, just because I can.

Oh, who am I kidding? Match Game (you want to click that link) has everything to do with everything.

I can't wait 'til next October!

what are YOU doing this weekend?

Well, whatever it is you're doing, just think- it could involve Uwe Boll. That's right, the Doctor will be doing a 2 hour signing at Spudic's Movie Empire this Saturday, 11/7, from 6-8pm. Bring along your copies of Alone in the Dark and BloodRayne and tell him how much you love him...or challenge him to fisticuffs or some such. How you choose to spend your moments with Dr. Boll is up to you!

Spudic's Movie Empire
5910 Van Nuys Blvd
Van Nuys CA 91401